Feedback on The Circles

[Elfhild]

It was Angmar's wish that I continue The Circles. After taking a long hiatus from writing, I am rereading The Circles from the very beginning. As I read, I am adding minor grammatical corrections and improvements. Since I know more now where the story has gone and where it will go than I did when Angmar and I first started writing, I am looking back with hindsight and making changes which will help direct the story towards the ultimate goal. While the main story line of each book will NOT be changing, I will be tweaking some of the minor plotlines and improving characterization.

Leave feedback for The Circles in this thread.

[Anon]

Just finished Book 5, and I have to say that I greatly appreciate all the time and effort that you and Angmar have put into the series thus far. I admit I was initially somewhat disappointed because I started this series thinking it was a typical romance story between the Witch-King and a random OC. But as I progressed, The Circles got me hooked on an adventure filled with constant drama and suspense. And the amount of personality and details that you both put into the characters and the scenery in addition to the use of lore really fleshes out The Circles that helps it stand out. Anyways, I hope you stay safe and strong during these trying times and can’t wait for the next book!

[Elfhild]

Hello! Thank you for commenting on The Circles!

Angmar always preferred adventure type stories to romances, so most of The Circles is adventure/drama. I know the story is somewhat unconventional for fanfiction, as most fanfic writers prefer to write stories which revolve solely around canon characters or romances with their favorite canon characters. However, Angmar came from a gaming background, and as a gamer, he saw Tolkien's world as an enormous sandbox in which to play. He was always fascinated by what Tolkien DIDN'T write, such as the lands and peoples of Mordor, Nurn, Harad, Khand, and Rhun.

The Circles actually started out as a 30-chapter roleplaying spin off campaign from Second Darkness, the roleplaying game that Angmar operated between 2004-05. Then we decided to make The Circles its own story, completely removed from the RPG.

I am currently working on Book 6 as I write this post. Most of the books past Book 5 are rough drafts, so they require a bit of editing in places.

Again, thank you for your kind words, and keep checking back!

[leyara]

Hi Elfhild - first I want to say I'm sorry for your loss. Angmar was a great writer and I'm sure he will be dearly missed. I saw your updates, as well as the part about editing some of the earlier books. A few years ago I borrowed some of Book 1's Battle of Helm's Deep chapters for an editing workshop at my university, and they might not be the changes you're looking for but I still have them if you're interested.

Regarding the latest chapters: It makes my heart ache whenever the Twins have a brush with Minas Morgul where they just barely miss a rescue. Also, Elfhild's new(?) infatuation with Esarhaddon - could that be an aftereffect of the potion?

[Elfhild]

Thanks so much for posting! I always enjoy hearing from readers.

Angmar's death was a devastating loss. His health had been declining for years, but took a very bad turn in 2018-19. Not a day goes by when I do not miss him. Working on The Circles makes me feel comfort, as I remember when we wrote all these chapters together.

I would be interested in seeing what the editing workshop did to the Helm's Deep chapters. I probably wouldn't change anything, though, as most of the battle chapters were done entirely by Angmar.

I did a LOT of revisions to Book Five, when compared to the other books, which were mostly grammatical changes. There were many issues with the characterization, as the books were written and revised over the course of many years. Keep in mind that the books were NOT written in their current order, and the earliest Circles writings (Books 9-11, maybe Book 12) have not been posted yet! Esarhaddon originally started out as an anti-hero who could do some very bad things, then he became more of a true villain, then he went back to being an anti-hero. I tried to make him come across as a little bit less villainous, in keeping with his portrayal in upcoming editions.

No, the potion that Esarhaddon gives the twins is just a sleeping draught... although your idea is a good one, I must say.

Elfhild does develop feelings towards Esarhaddon, but it is more out of desperation and self-preservation than actual love (although her naivete tells her otherwise).

During one of the many edits/revisions, Angmar and I did put in some hints that there might be some connection between the Witch-king and Elfhild. This was actually my idea, and Angmar just went along with it. However, this particular plotline (which involved a magic spell and a misdelivered letter) had some major logic problems and caused a lot of issues with future storylines, so I removed that entire thread in the recent revision.

Most likely Elfhild and the Witch-king will meet one day, but it will have to wait until Book 12 or 13.

[leyara]

It seems I no longer have access to the school google drive where I kept the editing workshop pieces, so sadly I don't have anything to share on that front. I'm excited to read more of Goldwyn soon, though, especially given everything that's happened with the spirit possession! I might have to do some re-reading before then, she's been out of the story for a while and I don't want to miss any details.

[Elfhild]

There are a few references to Goldwyn in Book 6. Angmar always wanted her to be somewhat mysterious, so usually what we know of her comes from other characters' observations (sort of like how Sam, rather than Frodo, is the narrator of Frodo's quest).

Goldwyn later returns for Books 9 and 10.

[leyara]

I really like the idea of Mordor and its vassal states as a multilingual nation. Would regions such as Far Harad, which are more distant from the center of the empire, share the same feature or would they primarily keep to their own language with only scribes, high officials, and frequent travelers such as merchants learning Black Speech? Would Near Harad and Far Harad have a British/American English kind of dialect split for Haradric, or would it be more like Swiss vs. Germany German where it can feel like almost an entirely different language?

[Elfhild]

I would say that the further one got away from Mordor, the less common Black Speech and multilingualism would be, at least among the common people. I always got the implication that Black Speech was meant to be Mordor's version of Common Speech. Of course, nobility, officials, merchants, etc. would pretty much HAVE to know a variety of languages for business and diplomatic purposes. I would imagine that, depending upon the region of Near/Far Harad, Khand, Rhun, etc., there would be many different dialects, some with minor differences, while others might seem like an entirely different language altogether. Sadly, Tolkien never came up with any words for the people of these lands.

I once read a fanfiction where a character, who was from a more remote part of Rohan, barely knew any Westron. I always thought that was a nice touch on the part of the author, because it's easy to take for granted the fact that when people like the Rohirrim speak in Common Speech (Westron), they are speaking in a second language. Also, most of the characters in LOTR, with the exception of Sam, come from wealthy or noble backgrounds, so they are very educated and know at least two languages.

[Elfhild]

The Circles website is down right now. I think ALL of the sites hosted by Byethost might be down at the moment.

To be honest, I have been considering switching over to a paid host. Due to various reasons, I am not very happy with my current free host.